Do I want to take that road…?

“1f y0u c4n r34d 7h15, y0u r34||y n33d 70 637 |41d.” - unknown

Reason #8: Because you will not only dream with a bear barrel, you will sleep with one too! It may not bee that bad, so read on…

Reason #7: Because you might not want to use shaving cream or banana EVER.

Reason #6: Because you won’t be able to find a toothpick, unless you look in the mirror.

Reason #5: Because you may never want to play jenga again.

Reason #4: Because your Christmas present will be Vesteva.

Reason #3: Well, the guys will sure want to go camping with you.

Reason #2: Because a hangover will be the least of your problems.

Reason #1: Because you will wake up with a dry mouth.

LCD Heads

A relaxing day by the swimming pool

1) What’s the Cuban National Anthem?

Row, Row, Row Your Boat

2) Where does an Irish family go on vacation?

A different bar

3) What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?

Sum Ting Wong

4) What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?

A speech impediment

5) What does it mean when the Post Office’s flag is flying at half-mast?

They’re hiring

6) In Greece, how do they separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar.

7) Why aren’t there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?

Because they’re not going to workin the future either.

8 ) What do you call a Mississippi farmer with a sheep under each arm?

A pimp.

9) Why do Driver Education classes in redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?

Because on Tuesday! and Thursday,the Sex Ed class uses it.

10) What’s the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?

The southern zoo has a descriptionof the animal on the front of the cage along with a recipe.

11) How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the ‘F’ word?

Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell ‘BINGO!’

12) What’s the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale???

A northern fairytale begins, ‘Once upon a time…’ A southern fairytale begins, ‘Y’all ain’t gonna believe this s**t’!

13) Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team?

Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States.

Always be wary of the Software Engineer who carries a screwdriver.
– Robert Paul

Only in America